You’re Dating a 12 Year Old!

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This might sound extremely creepy, but before you turn yourself in to the appropriate authorities, let me explain.

Men are childish, stupid, and immature, because inside every well dressed, well spoken, and even the not so well dressed and plain old dumb man, is a twelve year old boy. I should know, because for the better part of my life I have been one.

This is nothing new.

I bet Adam told Eve, that he didn't want to watch another sunset, because he was playing with a really cool lizard. Adam wasn't being mean, or insensitive, or trying to teach Eve a lesson. He was just amazed by a lizard and that’s it.

Eve didn't realize Adam was just acting like a 12 year old boy, who was mesmerized by something simple. She couldn't believe that it was that simple. So, she made something from nothing, and ended up creating a huge thing out of nothing.

Women, let’s learn from the past!

What do we know for a fact?

Every man is a 12 year old boy!

That means, if you ask a 12 year old boy, “Would you rather hang out with your friends and play video games, or join me for a quiet evening gazing into each other’s eyes?” He, most likely, is going to pick video games.

Don't give your man a choice, if one of the choices is a trap. Before you ask him a question, think,

HOW WOULD A 12 YEAR OLD BOY ANSWER THIS?

And that is probably exactly how your man will. So, if you want to face gaze, just tell him, “I want to gaze at your face tonight, and I want you to do the same to me.”

Sure it all sound stupid, but men are stupid, but for some reason you seem to like them. So do your self a favor and get to know that 12 year old version of your man.

Have some fun with it. Ask him what his fantasies were, when he was twelve. Then do some. Let him watch you shower. Lay naked on the bed and let him play doctor. And when you are getting dressed, stop, and ask him if he would like to touch your boob. I bet he would.

And men reading this, if your girl ever tried this hard to make it work with you, thank her! Because we are not attracted to us, for a reason, and girls just haven’t found out what we already know. They can easily do better.

Author profile

Robert Kitchen was raised in Hawaii, with his two brothers and three sisters. He, left Hawaii and moved to California, to pursue his dream of a career in comedy.
During that time, Robert got married, had two kids, and discovered his fondness for writing and creating comedy sketches, most of which depicted his distinctly odd take on being a stay-at-home dad, and his love for witty banter. Robert Kitchen can still be seen performing, on iO West's house improv team - DCT, almost every Friday night.

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