• About
  • Connect
  • Services
  • Advertise
  • Urban Dater on Twitter
  • Urban Dater on Facebook
  • Subscribe to the Urban Dater RSS Feed
  • Urban Dater on Instagram
Explore Close
Menu Close

Categories

Dating & RelationshipsOnline DatingTips & AdviceRelationshipsFor MenAsidesSelfSexFor WomenOpinionDates & DetailsFeaturedUncategorizedDate IdeasSpecialAdvertDating SitesQuestions and AnswersFashionNews

Tags

DatingRelationshipsOnline DatingSexloveadvicedating advicerelationshipdating tipssinglefirst datewomenrelationship adviceromancevalentines dayFor WomendatesFor Menmenobservations

Archives

January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019
  • Online Dating
    • Dating Apps
    • Dates & Details
    • For Women
    • For Men
  • Dating & Relationships
    • Fashion
    • Opinion
    • Self
    • Tips & Advice
  • Ask the Urban Dater
  • Sex
    • Adult Dating
    • BDSM
    • Better Sex
    • LGBTQ
    • Love
    • Sexting
  • Write for Us!
  • About
  • Connect
  • Services
  • Advertise
  • Urban Dater on Twitter
  • Urban Dater on Facebook
  • Subscribe to the Urban Dater RSS Feed
  • Urban Dater on Instagram

the Urban Dater

A Blog About Online Dating, Relationships & Sex

  • Online Dating
    • Dating Apps
    • Dates & Details
    • For Women
    • For Men
  • Dating & Relationships
    • Fashion
    • Opinion
    • Self
    • Tips & Advice
  • Ask the Urban Dater
  • Sex
    • Adult Dating
    • BDSM
    • Better Sex
    • LGBTQ
    • Love
    • Sexting
  • Write for Us!
Close
NextClicking for Love Documentary Interview. Part 2
  • Explore
  • Menu
  • Menu
Dating & RelationshipsTips & Advice

You Settling, Settleristic, Settlephyte, Settler!

yannibmbr on September 17, 2010
Share This Article
Facebook0Tweet0Pin0
Settling for a Table of Mediocrity

Don't be a Settling Sally, or Settling Steven or Some Other Twat Who Settles!

Yeah, this post isn't going to win me traffic or awards based on the Search Engine Optimization of this post's title. F*ck it, though. I really don't care. Today's post is brought to you by Land O Lakes Butter and Hubris (not to be confused with yummy hummus!). The topic of women, boobs, boobs and slow motion ass slapping came up once again with a couple of the fellas. The fellas with whom I was sharing this riveting discourse were Mondo P. McScratchn'sniff and Rod. You may remember Rod from his dealings with a psycho gal who sent him crazy text messages. As we were there discussing the realistic frames per second we'd need to film to show the desired amount of bosom bounciness from a slo-mo ass slap the topic became a little more serious and a lot less interesting to me. The topic was about settling. Oh sure, you've read posts about settling here and everywhere else! Well, tough! You're about to get another dose of it!  Haha! Suckers. Ahem! Anyway; settling.

Settle for nothing less than everything you deserve. … the moment you settle for less than you deserve, you deserve what you settled for. — Jack, from Brooklyn

Think about that statement. What do you think? Aside from the obvious; that Jack is a hell of a smart guy and far more wise than myself. Yes, I know this.

Jack's statement sticks with me and it popped into my mind during my convo with the guys. It's simple and true. Rod was talking or, rather, thinking out loud: “You know, Nancy. She's so beautiful… So gorgeous. But dammit if she doesn't come off as dumb and she's not,” cried Rod. He continued, “I mean she says ‘like' and ‘um' and ‘totally' waay too much and she just doesn't sound, well, bright. I don't feel like I can bring her around and introduce her to my friends and family. I'm not proud enough to do that.” Then Rod posed the real question: “Does it matter to me?” The answer was a resounding YES! It DID matter to him. Rod also wanted kids somewhere down the road, Nancy didn't. Did that difference matter to Rod? It mattered to him like chains and rope matter to a bondage scene.

The story may seem a bit winding, if not totally unnecessary, but it illustrates a point: Don't settle. You might be with a great guy; a great gal that treats you right in all the ways that matter. However, if your heart doesn't do the fluttery pitter patter stuff then that person may not be the right one. If there are critical issues like differences of opinion on marriage and kids, yet everything else is great you have some soul searching to do. Say to yourself and then ask: “This is where my lover is different than me. Does it matter to me?”

Does it matter to you? It better and if it does, stick to your guns; you're absolutely responsible for 100% of everything you settle for.

Signup for Our Newsletter

Get Us in Your Inbox!

Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox…
Follow @theurbandater



Share This Article
Facebook0Tweet0Pin0
  • Posted in: Dating & Relationships, Tips & Advice
  • Tagged in: advice, love, Relationships, settling, texting

Posted by yannibmbr

Alex is the founder, creative director and managing editor at the Urban Dater. Alex also runs his own boutique marketing agency in Orange County, Ca: DigiSavvy. Among his treasured pursuits are bike rides with his girlfriend (don't be perverted, now!), hiking, watching the Portland Trailblazers and the LA Angels. Follow Alex: Twitter | LinkedIn

All Posts
Show comments Hide comments

One Comment

  1. Medicine Ball Exerci September 26, 2010 at 1:15 pm

    Keep up the good work, I like your writing.

    Reply

Leave a reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Popular

  • 8 Things to Say to Your Ex Who You Still Love
  • A Girl doesn’t Text Back – Use These Texts Instead Of leaving Her Alone
  • What to Say to a Girl You Just Met
  • Men Who Give You Their Number Instead of Taking Yours. ~ Group Post.
  • 7 Tips on How to Give Your Partner Great Phone Sex
  • 3 Questions To Ask Yourself After 3 Months of Dating
  • Why Does He Want to be Friends if He Doesn’t Want to Date You?
  • How to Scratch Someone’s back
  • Seven Things You Should Be Looking For By The Fifth Date
  • Letters to Lovers Lost

Signup for Our Newsletter

Online Dating, Sex and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox...
Follow @theurbandater

Previous
Clicking for Love Documentary Interview. Part 2
September 16, 2010
Next
What My Nana Taught Me About Life and Dating
September 19, 2010

Let’s Socialize

  • Urban Dater on Twitter
  • Urban Dater on Facebook
  • Subscribe to the Urban Dater RSS Feed
  • Urban Dater on Instagram

General Bullshit

  • About
  • Disclosure Statement
  • Legal
  • Guest Posting
  • Terms and Conditions for Contributors

Archives by Month

© 2021 the Urban Dater by DigiSavvy, Inc. — Proudly Hosted on WP Engine —
  • Urban Dater on Twitter
  • Urban Dater on Facebook
  • Subscribe to the Urban Dater RSS Feed
  • Urban Dater on Instagram
Dating & Relationships

You Settling, Settleristic, Settlephyte, Settler!

by yannibmbr time to read: 2 min
Dating & Relationships Why Does He Want to be Friends if He Doesn’t…
Dating & Relationships 5 Easy Ways to Hack Your Dating Life
1