There I was sitting on my pleather couch eating a fist full of self respect and washing it down with a stiff glass of shut the hell up juice! My eyes were fixed on the TV. You see, it was Shark Week. I never got the popularity of it all, and Craig Ferguson wasn't doing much to stir up this excitement. Actually, it was kind of clear why he's the number four or five man on American Late Night Television, but I digress. Mr. Fergie was narrating a segment when he segues to another person who had an “unpleasant meeting” with some sharks.
I drew closer to the screen and was horrified by what I was to witness. The guy had his calve muscle cleanly ripped from his leg!!! WTF? He said, “I knew as soon as the shark bit me my life would never be the same…” Took you that long to figure that out, eh? Tool! As this sod is being carried away, you see bone, loosely draped skin and blood. Oh the blood! Earning one's “Red Wings” seemed like such a trivial matter in comparison.
So with all the blood dripping, I thought it would be a good idea for the Urban Dater to have a “Shark Week” of its own. No, I don't want to see pics of sharks eating people, or people peeing on sharks or other weird shit that our readers are surely in to…
That said, please take a moment and vote on what theme you'd like to see represented for a week! C'mon, do it!
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