Friends with Benefits…Without Intimacy?

friends with benefits, casual sex, FWB, NSA relationships, can you be friends with benefits, the urban dater, sex advice, dating advice

There are times in an adults life where a friends with benefits situation could be useful. I don't believe the concept is bad. However, when did having friends with benefits mean that there is no tenderness or intimacy? A person calls, makes an appointment, and the rendezvous is arranged. Does that mean that there is no civility, no respect, no intimacy?  … [Read more...]

How Do You Know When You’re in Love?

heartbreak, crying, smeared mascara, how do you know you're in love, dating advice, the urban dater, romance, dating stories

How do you know when you’re in love? I always thought it was a matter of “when," like it could be so easily defined by a year or two years or at least three for what you feel to be real in any way. I force myself to swallow down something condescending like “Maybe you don’t know what you feel so you call it love,” when a friend tells me that three months … [Read more...]

Warning: Small Penis Ahead

rejection, self-esteem, small dicks, small penis

I adore Coach bags. I was drooling over a new satchel bag online and decided to go to the Coach store to view it in person. When I arrived at the store to purchase it, imagine my surprise that the bag was called a mini! It was half the size of a regular bag. I realized that a mini wouldn't do; I need a full size bag. I meet an attractive guy and the … [Read more...]

Unforgettable Dates For Adrenaline Junkies

DCIM100GOPRO

Are you a couple who is full of adventure? Wanting to explore the world? Experience things? Take life by the scruff of the neck and live it to the max? Then forget a nice bistro or drinking an over exuberant cocktail from a barrel in a mock-tiki bar; take your next date on a trip they will never forget. If you and your partner - perhaps even first date - … [Read more...]

Four Common Misconceptions About Online Dating

sexting, online dating, dating tips, dating advice

Online dating can be a great tool. Having thousands of eligible singles at the click of a mouse (or the tap of a finger) can mean the difference between perpetual loneliness and happiness with another person. However, finding love on the internet is only effective if you approach it realistically and honestly. Many people hold misguided views about online … [Read more...]

How to Break Up With Someone You Still Love

Breaking up with someone you love

You have just broken up with your ex and the prospects of facing the world without her prove bleak. You are dejected, upset and heartbroken. How do you break up with someone you still love? You need to get out a grip on yourself and get out of this depressed state. It is possible and you have to understand that all is not lost. Breaking up is so … [Read more...]

Breakup City: Population Us

dear sugar, cheryl strayed, heartbreak, wisdom, dating advice, the urban dater, betty mars,

At this point, the Urban Dater has been around long enough to see many a relationship come and go. Our many contributors have covered the ins and outs of breaking up from nearly every angle. And now, it’s time for me to throw my breakup on top of the pile. Last time I was here, I shared some stream of consciousness drivel (I AM NOT LINKING YOU BECAUSE I … [Read more...]

How Honest Are We?

Screen-Shot-2014-11-30-at-8.42.16-pm

You could hit me with a red flag and said, "I just hit you with a red flag," and I still wouldn't take the hint that I was in a bad situation. I am a hopeful romantic. Red flags for me are weaknesses in a person I can overlook or accept. This particular night out it must have been the combination of over-dramatic venting about wanting a relationship, with … [Read more...]

The 5 Biggest Mistakes Singles in Their Twenties Make

Mistakes twenty somethings make

The twenties are a great time in just about anybody's life. The twenties are a decade where the world is full of hope, opportunity, and best of all, great potential for finding love. Unfortunately, love is also the department where men and women of this age range often make the most mistakes that can easily be avoided. In this article, I will be discussing … [Read more...]

Giving Thanks and a Birthday

Screen Shot 2014-11-27 at 9.52.26 AM

I started getting a few messages from folks on LinkedIn congratulating me. Surely, I'd done something shitty, but no. Upon further investigation, I saw that LinkedIn alerted the world that I'd been "working at" the Urban Dater for 6 years now. Really? Six years!? Wow. I know I don't write as much as I once did, yet I do still date like a motherfucker. But … [Read more...]