Before I get into this article, understand that this about rape fantasies. So don't flame me in the comments section for saying I'm insensitive and a gigantic ass bag. I know this already! I have to live with myself, people!!! So you're probably here for a few reasons: For starters, maybe you're here because you're offended by the title, you think I'm a huge perv; perhaps you want to teach me a lesson and call me a turd? Go for it, comments are below. Or you want to get raped to satisfy your fantasy. If so, read on.
People are into some off the wall stuff. There's no way around it. It's impossible for me to sit here, in my closet full of Ed Hardy shirts and the shattered remains of my heterosexuality, and catalog each and every fetish. But let's talk about Rape Fantasies.So why would a woman want to be raped and how can we, as men, help them get raped? Actually, that sounds really bad. No, we're not actually trying to get women raped, I mean that's not good at all. To be clear, we're talking about the fantasy of rape that some women seem to have and ways that their men can accommodate that fantasy and, in doing so, incite a more intense sexual experience.
Okay, let's try to understand some of what goes into this fantasy of rape. Some people, men and women (yes, both), enjoy suffering within the throes of sexual congress. It's a masochistic mindset and if you believe what you read in Psychology books or hear from your local run-of-the-mill therapist, then Masochism and rape fantasies go together like peas and carrots. Or, perhaps, a person is just very much a Marco Polo of sex, or the James T. Kirk of sex, going where no man has gone before… So, in short, some people like pain with their sex, I know I do; I just don't wanna get raped as it reminds me of a bad rock climbing incident back in 86′ in Beirut. Some like the loss of control and being helpless, and it's a trust thing. Others just like an adventure… Struggle play is a big part of many peoples' sex lives and it manifests itself in a number of intriguing ways, including rape fantasies.
As we all should know communication is the key to a healthy relationship, just as much as it is to a healthy sex life. I can't tell you how many times I've heard from people, or friends, that are just having “ho-hum” sex or not having it at all! Lame! Communicate. While the inherent feeling behind a rape fantasy is to lose control and the feeling of controlled fear, I recommend talking about this with your partner first. I actually dated a girl that was very much into this. It came up in conversation. They key I took from our conversation was that she didn't want to know it was coming and she didn't want to feel like it was planned. I noted this factoid for later use, after our conversation.
It wasn't too long after when I indulged Kasey in her fantasy. We were on our way out to drink with her friends and I pinned her against a wall, forcefully, and I talked forcefully to her; told her what I'd do if she resisted me, and resisted she tried. Needless to say, I never saw her so intense…. It was something for the books, to be sure. Two things to note here: Communication. You have to be careful, you can't just do the rape fantasy with a gal that hasn't talked to you about it… There's a chance she may like it, but there's also a chance you'll be a featured member of your community's sex offender web site. That would suck worse than a hooker with lock jaw. The other thing to note is improvisation. I never brought the subject up after we talked about it. I talked to some friends about this and they agreed that I should make this as unscripted as possible. I had it in mind that we would be doing this in my home or hers, since I have a roommate, that probably wasn't going to work and hers needed to be out of town or overdosed on Flinstone Vitamins, I didn't care which! When the opportunity presented itself, I took it and I'm glad I did. While I, you know, had a good time, she was on overload and that's what got me going of course. It was really hot and she was exhausted and sweaty, it was amazing really, to be able to incite such a sexual response from someone. It seemed like a bit of a risk at the time, but in thinking about it, because we did talk about it, everything worked like a charm.
Communication and a safe place were the keys to the “game,” so to speak. Oh and if you fail hard at this whole rape fantasy thing, I take no responsibility for your failure, or if you get hauled off to the slammer, where you share a bed with big Manny, as he calls you “mija.” Not my fault.
Until next time, kids, have fun out there.