It may be traditional for the man to make the first move, but getting a girl to chase remains an essential step in any courtship. Women love the thrill of the chase just as much as men.
This is especially true with the most beautiful women, who have an array of dating options handed to them on a platter. They won’t admit it, but these women want a man they had to work for – not a bloke they simply let become their boyfriend. As humans, we only really value what we have to work for.
Fancy having beautiful women chasing a relationship with you? It only takes four simple steps.
These steps will only work if the woman is enjoying your company. Use them at high points in the interaction, after moments of laughter, sexual tension or signs of affection.
Step 1 – Give her a reason to chase
Once you've got the girl's attention, you need to get her interested. The best method is to present something of value or something of threat in your opening line. This is the carrot on your stick, so to speak. It gives her a reason to chase.
The classic example of presenting value is offering to buy a drink, although this advice is more likely to leave you out-of-pocket than in her pants. A better alternative could be a cold read. Most women would welcome the opportunity to learn how she's perceived by others. It could be something as simple as guessing where she's from.
A neg isn't necessarily gentlemanly, but it often hooks a girl's attention because it's a threat to her reputation. A warning about something threatening in the environment might also be an option.
Obvious tip: Don’t be threatening in and of yourself.
Step 2 – Give her an opportunity to chase
It's natural to be a motor mouth when you're nervous meeting women. Many men's strategies are to chat and chat and chat and avoid awkward silences at all costs.
For the first couple of minutes, you can control the chatter, but after that make sure she plays her part. Take more pauses than normal. Give her the opportunity to contribute to the conversation. By all means, give her branches to latch on to – and fill the silence if she doesn't oblige – but avoid asking questions.
Use assumptions instead. ‘Where are you from?' becomes ‘You look like you're from London.' Assumptions encourage her to ask questions. Suddenly, it's her chasing continued conversation – and that's all you're aiming for at this point.
Step 3 – Encourage her to chase you
When she asks questions, it's worth making her work a bit harder before answering.
Throw in phrases like ‘you sure you want to know?', ‘take a guess' or ‘you can't handle the answer!'
Use these sparingly though, or it becomes an annoying and obvious technique.
Step 4 – Force her into a decision
Once she's enjoying your company and chasing conversation, create a situation where she's forced to either stay or leave.
Start small. See if she'll move to a different part of the bar with you. Ask her to watch your belongings while you go to the bathroom. These small acts of compliance might not seem much, but they force the girl to ask herself the question: ‘Do I like him enough to do this? Yes.'
An alternative move could involve engaging in behaviour that would normally make her leave if she wasn't so invested…Tease her. Tell her she's free to leave if she's tired. Again she's forced to ask the question: ‘Do I like him enough to stay? Yes.'
Assuming you're a cool normal guy and not too outcome dependent, the answer will be yes. With both these tricks, she's forced to admit she likes you. That has a strong psychological effect. She'll ask herself why she's complying to these requests and attraction can be the only answer.
Pepper these techniques in with fun, laughter and light flirting and you'll soon be getting away with requesting heavier acts of compliance, such as kisses, exchanging phone numbers or even going home together.
Joe Elvin is a dating/relationships blogger based in London. His book 'The Thrill Of The Chase', which explains how to truly thrive in singledom, was published in 2017. Download the first chapter for free at eepurl.com/c-cmGP.