A Guy's Speed Dating Notes

Speed Dating Notes from a Guy
Let's see here: Has teeth, breathing, nice tits. What's your number again? Oh, yeah, your name is okay, too. Optional really.

Speed Dating Notes from a guy? Ladies, if you've speed dated, you've probably wondered what goes through a guy's mind when he only has a couple minutes to get to know you. You want to know, right? I'm sure some people will be disappointed in reading these notes as some of you give me the benefit of the doubt that I am not a jerk… Sorry to burst your bubble and drop kick your expectations over those mountains over yonder… I'm a turd. Plain and simple. You know this.

Well I just found some old notes I took when I'd went speed dating a couple years ago, I figured I'd share (I liked that 8 Minute Speed Dating gave these notepads to people also). In retrospect I'm a shallow little turd of manhood. Le sigh… Here goes.

  • Trina – Great attitude (she needs it), works at cal poly. good sense of humor.
  • jumalie – Nurse recently from Philippines, boring convo, pretty to look at, but so are whales.
  • Veronica – Canadian, nice and sweet, full figure curvy. Says “aboot.”
  • Audra -Funny, good personality, good sense of humor couldn't be less interested in me.
  • Katie – Bad sense of humor, boring from NYC (wouldn't shut up about it). Stab my eyes out, please.
  • Julie – Katie's roomie. loves dogs hates cats, abandonment issues and doesn't talk to dad. I need another drink.
  • Gina – Veterinarian, music lover, friends with Angela. cute. Rick's type. Greek. foodie. (Rick's type? Yeah, I didn't hit on this girl because the dude called dibs. Classic wingman strategy, kids!)
  • Angela – Smart, cute and a biz contact all we talked about was biz. WordPress work possibility
  • Jessie – Pretty and from NY. probably high. athletic, mellow, high. She smells like a bong and cabbage.
  • Allison – Least favorite. real estate investor, boring. blah. worst date. Wanted to hang self. Nickelback!!?
  • Amanda – Speech therapist. boring. nice gal and pretty nice legs
  • misty – Good personality. fun. witty. not my type, but her tits were.

Yes, ladies, even if you have a good personality, are witty and have no tits you're not our type. I'm kidding of course. I should note that these were all taken between and during each little “date.” =)

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13 Comments

  1. I was gonna go to court, before I got high
    I was gonna pay my child support, but then I got high (No you weren't)
    They took my whole pay check, and I know why, (why man) 'cuz I got high,
    Because I got high

  2. This made the fact that I'm at work today, a little less sad. bahaha. You are such a dude. Love it. Trying to figure out which is my favorite. I think it's 'smells like bong and cabbage'. hahaha

    1. You laugh, but that's the one I was going to go out with… But then she got high… Ooooh ooooh oooh… Then she got hiiiigh da da da duh duh da da..

  3. Will you please do this more so you will write more notes and then post them? I like funny.

    Hey great thanks.

    PS Seriously – Nickelback??!!

    1. You want me to be the scourge of online dating, NikkiB? Well, do you? Well, for you, hot stuff, I can manage that! =)

      Ps.
      Yeah, fucking Nickelback. That's when my eyes glazed over.

    1. As long as I can make the pretty girls laugh, I've done my good deed for the world, even though I'm a piece of shit. So, um, thanks!

  4. I heart smart n cute WP girls. This Angela gal sounds like a gem. πŸ˜‰

    PS – Gina is still "upset" about the Rick dibs calling that didn't result in any calling at all. Lmao.

    1. Um, Angela IS a gem through and through! =) And she's not too shabby for my bottom line either. =)

      Le sigh about Gina. I've got other alternative stand-in men for her, though, if she wants. A full stable of em!

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