When Good Sex Goes Bad

We have all had them in life… the “buddy” that only stays around because the sex is good.  Every time we get out of a semi-meaningful relationship, they are the first person we call.  It helps us to forget about what we are now out of and helps us to feel good and sexy again.  Plus, there is just something to be said about good sex making you forget about everything else in life.

But what happens when you get together that one time… and the sex is no longer good?  It never fails that one person becomes dissatisfied with the sex before the other.  How do you let the other person down gently?  You don't want to criticize their skills in the sack.  But you are also no longer interested in hooking up with them.

But then the question becomes this: do you pass off the one bad time as a fluke?  Was it just a bad day?  Or is it something that will continue if you get together again?  And, are you even willing to get together with them again?  If the only reason you meet up with them is because the sex is good, and it no longer is, then is it worth seeing them anymore?

Unfortunately there is no gentle way to let someone know that you no longer want to be their buddy.  If you have moved in to a new relationship, it is quite simple.  But if you just don't want to see them anymore, what can you do?  For a while, you can turn them down saying you have other plans and that you are busy.  But you can only be busy for so long.  In the end you have to explain to them that you are no longer interested in sleeping with them.  If only they made a Hallmark card for that…

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2 Comments

  1. This is so familar! There's also a flip side … when you are dating someone and the sex starts to lag. I know this is a sign you are losing interest, but it creates the same situation. Do you end the relationship or work on it. Call me shallow, but if the sex can't be improved I know the relationship won't work for me.

  2. It was one bad night, dangit!! I told you Mike Tyson punched my in the "unmentionables!!!" How would YOU perform after such a thing happened to you?

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