Stop Searching

Stop looking for “the one.”

I decided to turn my attention to work on myself. I need to find fulfillment in my life; I have to fulfill my needs, not someone else’s. Doing what is right for me means I will be in places, jobs, and near people aligned with my life path and myself. Just be yourself.

Most of us express only a small part of who we are. We have hidden or disowned parts of ourselves that will resurface; we just need to figure out which characteristics best suit who we are as a whole. I need to focus less on searching and more on letting things develop naturally. Hopefully, I’ll start to see all the flakes, narcissists, and liars fade into the background. I am focusing on making genuine connections with people, tumbling through one unhealthy relationship after another, and spending time with those who aren’t progressing into something of substance. Something more permanent. Filling time.No, one can see your value as a person if you don’t value yourself first. Attract people who share your values and are attracted to you based on who you are—my perfectly imperfect self.

It's impossible to find someone without some emotional baggage or insecurities. My mind is clear; my heart is open. But, the truth is, I deny myself of the person I am meant to attract by letting my fears get the best of me. Or, on most occasions settling for less than I deserve.

I have a horrible track record. I dated so many guys; even my grandmother said she wanted me to be happy; hoping that I finally find true love and realize I deserve more than I have been allowing myself. She is convinced this is my time. She also prays for me every night. I love her! Nothing happens by mistake, and sometimes you need to accept that you've gone through hell and back in the dating world to find someone who deserves you. I desire a more meaningful connection. I don’t want another fling; I want to fall in love and be deeply loved. So simple but complicated at the same time. Be clear about the type of relationship I want and the partner I want to be with. Finding love is not easy. It's all about timing as I am told. It’s about realizing who I want to be and finding someone who holds me to that.

Maybe the key is just allowing love to find me? In the meantime, have fun and go with the flow.

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