As most men explain it, the burden is on him to gather his rattling nerves. The burden is on him to make the initial move. The burden is on him to win the girl over. All she has to do is sit back and decide when to swing the cleaver at his nuts while they are laid out on the chopping block.What they are forgetting is that it is a lot of work for the girl to be responsible for rejecting the poor bastard and let him down as easily as possible. Most normal girls are not sadistic and do not enjoy crushing the hopes of the hapless chaps. Just as it sucks to be the hiring manager that also has to fire someone, it sucks to always have to be the one to say no.Just like being a man doesn't mean you want every girl you see, nor does a girl want every guy that comes up to them. The difference is that a man gets to approach any available girl that catches his eye while the girl has to wait and hope the right guy approaches her.
If you could get inside the heads of both these people and take a third party perspective, you will see that it is two sides of the same coin. Different angles in the same problem.
The guy has to risk rejection which can take a toll on an already weak self-esteem. The girl has to hope that the guy she wants notices her eye contact.So where do we go from here?
The first step to solving any problem is awareness. Simply understanding that we all share in this dilema and not blaming each other is a good first step. Stop blaming girls for being mean and heartless when you get rejected if you are a guy. Don't blame guys for trying if you are a girl. Usually that's the best they got and never had the right conditions to develop into strong, confident and socially skilled men. Just say no and you'll never see him again.
The second step is not to get caught up in trying to learn about ‘the game' and restrict your life with ‘rules' or tactics. This applies mostly to guys that try to memorize pick up lines but also to women who play waiting games with guys they DO like. Don't get it mixed up – flirting is fun, games are sick.
The real way to solve any of this is to work on ourselves. Whatever it takes to make you feel better about yourself also tends to make others want to be around you. Girls seem to get this a little better than guys and that has to do with the nature of female relationships to be based on emotional communication. Since guys don't open up as much because of the ego attached to one's dating life, they don't get the benefit of learning from each other's experience.
The best thing to improve your chances with the opposite sex is to improve yourself. This applies to both guys and girls. Do work that you love, get therapy if you have glaring emotional issues, and maintain your body so you feel good and look good too. Get a hobby and treat yourself to something. Some people might find yoga helpful. Others might go to a med-spa or even as far as to get a little plastic surgery, which you can find through this site here. Remember that the only judge is you. As long as it makes you feel better.It is okay if you are frustrated with your dating life. The process of growing and improving ourselves isn't supposed to be easy. But if you just did what is easy today it will be harder tomorrow.
If what you do is hard today, will be easier tomorrow.