Become the Man of Your Dreams, Part 1: Tough pills.

Be yourself. It's sound advice that we've all received. I've raised a middle-finger when receiving this bit of tried-and-true wisdom. Well, that’s because that advice is only half-baked when in actuality the phrase should be: Become the man you want to be—then be yourself.

Over the next few weeks I intend to write a series of articles that make up a comprehensive guide to improving yourself and attaining results past your wildest dreams, not just with women, but life in general. But why should you listen to me?

  1. Well, firstly, no one’s paying me to write this if I feed you BS, I’m only wasting my own time.
  2. Because however bad you may think you are women, once upon a time (i.e., three years ago), I was worse.

Listen, I'm not a vagina whisperer, and I don't know the “secret” of how to seduce women. I’m a guy who went from being rejected by 10/10 girls to being rejected by 2/10 girls in a space of three years(without having to join a gym or start making more money), which brings me to my first truth.

You will never be everyone's cup of tea

I want you to imagine the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen… got it? Great, now put your dick away and pay attention, cause' somewhere, there’s a guy that DOESN’T want her. Don’t believe me? That’s okay, but here’s the truth, no matter how much self-improvement you do, there will still be women who don’t want to sleep with you, and the primary basis of being an attractive man is to be okay with that. Attractive men don’t ask themselves, Does she like me, because frankly they don’t care, and neither should you. Think about it; you’re getting worked up over whether or not a complete stranger likes you when you don’t even know if you like her.

The problem with being nice to her

People can sense when someone’s trying to get their approval; this is doubly true for women, the moment you start agreeing with everything she says and liking all the things she likes, you might as well walk around with a sign that reads “will do anything to get laid.” You shouldn’t be mean to women either, just treat them as what they are, strangers (more on this another time), but for now, another truth.

You aren't going to get good at this today—or tomorrow

I’m sorry to disappoint you, but this stuff takes time. You won't become a lady-magnet overnight like Tom Hiddleston. It sucks, but that’s how it is. Remember, this isn’t a magic pill, it’s a self-help guide, which means I’m going to tell you everything you need to know, but YOU HAVE TO HELP YOURSELF, and your rate of improvement is only limited to how far you’re willing to step out of your comfort zone. Theoretical knowledge will only take you so far, ultimately, you have to go out and talk to women if you want to get better at talking to women.


All over the internet there are canned routines that are said to be foolproof (and maybe they are) but remember, those lines aren't one size fits all, they were tested under a very particular set of circumstances that may not apply to you!

Just say no to pick-up lines. Preconceived material is a limited resource. If you're using lines or scripted dialogue you will run out of material, you will run out of things to say, and you will fail. Also, there's the risk of her recognizing one of your lines from when another guy tried to use it on her (I'm serious, it's happened to me before). Using other people's material is just not a good idea. Avoid doing so at all costs.

I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this introductory piece, and I hope you find something helpful in my articles. Feel free to email me with any personal questions.

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Fiction and self help writer(relax, I never mix the two :P). My email account is very active, feel free to contact me! Life is great when you know how to live it.

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  1. “Become the man you want to be—then be yourself.” This is the killer ‘secret’. I think women have cracked into this a lot faster than men have, even if they don’t listen to their own advice. Men are a little harder to convince.

    I was never rejected by many women, but I think this is just as important in relationships as it is in picking up women. I learned the hard way that you have to work on yourself (and it is a lot of work) before you’re even ready to grow a fruitful relationship. Figure out what you want, figure out who you want to be, and be able to stand by yourself with or without a partner.

    Without doing that, you’re liable to either emotionally distance your partner from yourself, or drag her down with you when you become unhappy and/or unstable.

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