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Dating & RelationshipsTips & Advice

"Cutting the Red Wire" & Avoiding an Argument With Your Woman.

yannibmbr on March 3, 2010
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I don't do “dumb” arguments.  That is, I avoid those little arguments about nothing.  You know which ones I'm talking about?  The ones that start because you didn't put down the toilet seat.  The arguments that start because you smell like yesterday's under roos… Okay, maybe that's just a “me” thing, but I think you get the picture.  I won't date women that are prone to petty arguments because I'm not a guy that causes them or enjoys them.  However, make no mistake, I get into arguments… Or do I?Many times, if possible, I try to stop an argument before it stops.  There are situations where I have detected that the girl I'm with is upset or moody; I can tell something's up.  I'll be up front and call her on it.  Many times this results in a conversation where something is revealed to be an annoyance or an issue of some sort.  By addressing these things early on I can avert the possibility of a huge argument later on.  This is the benefit of pressing the action, kids.

It's not always about getting your lady to cough up what problems she may be having.  Sometimes she just needs to be a witting and willing accomplice to defuse a potential argument.  Sometimes it's wise to bring up such issues in your own words if possible.  If you sense there's an issue, bring it up and ask your lady what she thinks.  Preface it with the fact that you don't want there to be a huge issue, but you've been noticing “this thing or that thing” that have got you worried about where things are going… This can be a good way to get the conversation rolling and resolve a potentially messy issue.

There's endless scenarios that you could defuse and I'm certainly not going to tell you about them all.  I gotta teach you guys how to fish and let you do all the work yourselves.  Remember this tidbit of wisdom:  Don't be a pushover.  Sure, you want to be accommodating and have your woman communicate with you.  However, be mindful not to let her dictate the pace and the action all the time.  If an issue arises where she's upset about how you never go out then concede and go out; however, be sure to put your foot down and insist on a different activity.  Maybe you pick the next place to go out or even suggest making dinner at home.  Show strength so that your woman doesn't feel the urge to steam roll your ass on a whim.

Last but not least is effort.  If you make a little effort here and there then that goes a long way to keeping your gal happy and preempt many an argument.  That's a pro tip right there, peeps.

Until next time, don't even think of calling your woman a b#tch.

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  • Posted in: Dating & Relationships, Tips & Advice
  • Tagged in: advice, arguments, Dating

Posted by yannibmbr

Alex is the founder, creative director and managing editor at the Urban Dater. Alex also runs his own boutique marketing agency in Orange County, Ca: DigiSavvy. Among his treasured pursuits are bike rides with his girlfriend (don't be perverted, now!), hiking, watching the Portland Trailblazers and the LA Angels. Follow Alex: Twitter | LinkedIn

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3 Comments

  1. girltrueheart March 2, 2010 at 3:49 pm

    Things that come easily to me, like conversation, seem so lost on the younger generation. Bravo. It's like you're teaching a generation how to be human. Revolutionary.

    Reply

  2. yannibmbr March 3, 2010 at 1:40 am

    Thanks, dear. You see, my good work really is ensuring the continued procreation of our civilization. Yes, I know, I know; I deserve a freakin' prize or medal or something!

    Reply

  3. TheEngagementProject March 4, 2010 at 9:39 am

    500 thumbs up for finding a way to be considerate and attentive without losing the masculine upper hand in the relationship. Nothing worse than a pushover! I want all men I ever date to read this post.

    Reply

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Dating & Relationships

"Cutting the Red Wire" & Avoiding an Argument With Your Woman.

by yannibmbr time to read: 2 min
Opinion Relationships; So Easy a Caveman Can Do It! Part 4…
Dating & Relationships The Order of Operations for Dating
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