There are more and more men out there who have become emotionally unavailable. It may be from a past abusive relationship or simply a broken heart that makes them shut their feelings down and hide their hearts away from the world. You see, the pain of dating a man like this is surely unbearable. They are manipulative. They always criticize you and at the end of the day, no one is happy. There are some signs which you can spot right on the first data that let you know he is truly emotionally unavailable. So if you do see these signs in him, don't even bother to date him any longer. He's only going to break you if you do.
1. All he does is talk about himself
You can't even get a word out without him rudely interrupting you to tell you something about his past. For some reason, there is never any emotion involved in these conversations because he doesn't talk about that broken heart or the way he lost someone he loved when he was a kid. He only brags and makes himself look amazing in your eyes! But when he doesn't even pay attention to what you're saying and if he doesn't even ask ‘how are you?', then you know that he is just self-centered and selfish.
2. He's a bad communicator
From the moment when he sees that you've fallen for him, he will stop texting you first. Days will go by before he calls you at all. Of course, there may be many reasons for this, but if you know that he's not busy with work, if you know that there is no reason for him not to text you, then he wants to tell you something through his behavior. It's not just about texting and calling, have you ever had a deeper connection by talking about something emotional? Have you ever sat down with him and for hours talked about things that bother you both and make you vulnerable and insecure? You see, emotionally unavailable men are natural commitment-phobes and he doesn't want an emotional connection with anyone. That's why he avoids talking about important things.
3. He always makes excuses
Well, there he is again – having the perfect excuse for something. He cancels your date night because he has to wash his underwear. He vanished from the face of the earth, he doesn't text you, doesn't want to see you, but all this time, he's been having the greatest excuses for everything. And when you ask him to let you help him, he closes himself up, telling you that he has it all figured out.
4. You see each other only when he wants
You're super into him because he used his mind-vibes to manipulate you. You love to be together with him because even if he's the one doing all the talking, you're just happy that you can sit next to him and listen to what he has to say. But isn't it a bit weird that you two only see each other when he wants it? He's always busy when you invite him out, but if you refuse to go out with him, he automatically gets mad. This way, he establishes control within the relationship.
5. He avoids ‘the talk'
Every time you try to talk to him about your relationship and what it might be turning into, he just avoids the conversation altogether. When you try to ‘label' your relationship, when you ask him ‘what are we?', all he does is yell at you, telling you that you're pushing him and that you're way too needy. Wait. What?! And believe me, he's not afraid of how much he likes you. He's afraid of commitment all together.
6. But he's always up for sex
You should watch out for the obvious sign that he's emotionally unavailable: he wants to sleep with you right after the first date. He doesn't want an emotional connection, but he'll do anything to get in your pants. He might even use manipulation to get there, telling you that ‘if you really liked him, you'd do this for him' or ‘he's a broken man and this is the only way to feel comfort'. Don't fall for it.