Men: Let’s Work on Our Dating Profile

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Men go onto these online dating site hoping upon hope that they will find that woman who will be an answer to all their prayers. This woman who will be their dream girl, the girl who cooks and cleans, loves sports and getting dirty, is amazing in bed and gets along great with their mother, and of course fits their desire of what they want in looks. These men then get confronted with having to fill out questions and loading photos to draw this woman into their lives. They feel they are bringing everything to the table, that women will throw themselves at them because of their photo alone. They are wrong. Very, very, very wrong.

They will get women who will contact them based on their looks alone but those are usually a specific type of woman which I won’t get into right now. These women are NOT what these men are looking for at all but sadly they will settle for and then complain about later on.

I’ve been single for over two years after a serious relationship and have tried out almost every dating site out there to see what the world wide web has to offer in terms of single men. I am sad to say…..it is very disappointing. Now, I’m not saying that all men are failures and that there are no good ones on these sites because there are. These men are far and few and you ladies are very lucky if you happen to stumble across one. I’m voicing out about the men who don’t take the time to really care but expect Pamela Anderson, Jessica Beil, or Mila Kunis to come knocking on their inbox begging these men to marry them.

I have noticed, while visiting sites, that I sometimes know these men in real life and I will sometimes browse on what they have going on and are bringing to the dating table. I love when I start reading and realise what they are spewing are complete and utter lies. I hold back on calling these men out but I do keep a mental note for later conversations where they complain about some woman they went on a date with. I also find it interesting when I am speaking to these men in person and all they do is say how they don’t want a girlfriend or anything serious, they just want sex. Then on their profile they are telling these women they want something stable and that is worth time and energy and they aren’t like every other guy out there. Mhmm, sure, thank you for proving a point to almost every single woman.

I wish there was a way to inform these guys that they need better profiles, that they need to state what they really want instead of what they think we want to hear. We would prefer knowing if you are looking for just someone to sleep with instead of trying to tell us you want a girlfriend and then pulling a ghost after the first romp in the sheets. They just need a better profile overall.

Men need to start list their true age. You will be browsing and look at the age and then you see a picture and dear lord, they look 40 when they are listing 22. They will then type these tiny little snippets of information such as: I like sports. I like tattoos. I hate liars. I want kids. Message me I’m fun *Blank Look* Your page just put me to sleep, how are you fun?!?! We will also run into the men that give you a book, and I’m not talking a book you want to read, but a book telling you EVERYTHING you could ever possible want to know and things you don’t care to hear. Sadly women will run into a profile where the main topic is about their ex girlfriend/wife and how these women ruined their lives. These men should not be on dating sites because they are not over the situation they just got out of.

Some of the sites out there ask you to have a headline or just a title….this is not something girls really wants to read right off the bat LOVES TO EAT P#SSY! or please don’t post this: I have a bite! Hope she don’t put up a big fight ;) …if you are seeing someone…..don’t be on the sites!

Guys will also list what they are looking for….but then have a list of everything they don’t want:

If you have red hair go away. If you are bigger than a size 4, your fat and go to the gym because you are going to be alone. If you just want to have sex go away. If you didn’t go to college and/or you didn’t graduate you are going to be a waist of my time because I know you can’t be a smart person. I know this makes girls mad but I’m just being honest because I’m proud of myself and my body and only a goddess will get this.

I want to hit those guys…I really do. I love when someone who has a profile like that messages me and is all ‘hey you want to hook up some time, blah blah blah.’ I want to write back with a usual witty comment about how they have a small dick or something. Trust me, a good insult gets similar results on-line as it would in person. Men please remember that you might have just insulted the woman who would have been perfect for you but you were just too worried with what you THINK you want.

Lastly….one of the things you need to focus on are the pictures. If the only photos on your profile are from your shoulders down to below your underwear line (AKA torso), and all you are wearing is some tiny little boxer shorts…get a life. Thank you for sharing your very nice body, it was a pleasure to look at, but now I don’t want to talk to you because it just wont end well, I know what you are really interested in and it isn’t a girlfriend. If in every photo you are drunk or high….please edit or just don’t post and save me some time. If every photo looks like you took a picture of another photo or a screen shot….learn how to properly use a computer it isn’t that hard, the internet or a 5 year old can help you. If in every picture you are standing next to a different girl who isn’t wearing very many clothes, or no clothing at all….just go onto the “I like to have sex with random girls and take their picture for a memory” sites :)

Men: You just need a couple things for a nice profile

1. Nice pictures: One of just your face, one of a full body picture (with clothes) and one showing you with friends in a normal setting.
2. Have a profile not filled with broken lines but not a book. Keep the ex out of the conversation!
3. Just the basics: Name, interests, what you want from the site or what you are looking for in a girl.
4. Be HONEST! You’d be surprised. I respect the hell out of the men who take the time to be honest on their sites and will move on if it isn’t what I want.

I know that it is hard out there, trust me, but if you try and actually are honest but not a complete douche you will find that girl you have been looking for. Women can tell when a man isn’t actually trying or isn’t actually interested in this dating life and they will avoid you. If you are true about dating don’t take this as a joke, just take a little extra time and spruce up that profile.

Happy Dating!!!

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I'm a twenty-something blogger over at Simple Sinlge Girl Life .I was born in Manhattan and raised in Florida. I have two fur-babies and love a bottle of cheap wine. I write about my many adventures of strange dates, the random thoughts that run through my mind, and the interesting girl talk that sometimes occurs.

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Comments

  1. yannibmbr says

    Haha. This is awesome, Brie! Were you looking at my OkCupid profile though? Because “Loves to Eat Pussy,” is my headline, I believe. ;)

  2. says

    Bree,

    This is a funny article and informative at the same time. If there is anything that is a complete epedemic right now its men that create profiles and pictures that take them out of the game before they even get their foot in the door. The problem is, not enough guys that need this type of advice read these articles!

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