Oh S#!+, She’s Pissed & Angry! Now What!!? 5 Ways to Calm Your Angry Woman.

Yeeeaaaaah.  Angry women.  I’m not gonna lie, I kind of think an angry woman is hot which is why Shan­non Daugh­erty ruled my world for such a long time.  No judgers, damn you!  Any­way, the woman I’m see­ing, well, we got into an argu­ment… We ended up “sex­ing” things out.  Wait!  What?  What is this voodoo you speak of???!  Patience Padawan Learner.  Let me explain…Women; all they want is respect and some cour­tesy at the end of the day.  So with my girl breath­ing fire and kick­ing pup­pies I knew the next few words out of my mouth needed to be respect­ful, cour­te­ous and appeal to her rea­son­ing.  Telling her to “stop being a bitch and make me some hum­mus,” in ret­ro­spect, is prob­a­bly what landed me in the hos­pi­tal for a few hours… That said, here’s what I suggest:

1. Own it - That’s right, own it.  What I mean is that your woman isn’t mad for no rea­son, she’s pissed because of some­thing in par­tic­u­lar.  If you try to give her the facts of the sit­u­a­tion when she’s inflamed she’s likely to rip your mandible pecker off and knock you silly with it.  Instead tell her “Okay, okay. Can we talk, I didn’t real­ize that this was such an issue,” or “My bad, I’m sorry, but can we talk about this?” Try to calm her by get­ting more feed­back from her.  The key is to LISTEN!
2. Don’t Hulk Up — Women and piss­ing con­tests go about as well together as your penis, a water-​​filled bath tub, and plugged-​​in elec­tronic appli­ances; which is to say none of them go together very well at all.  Don’t fight fire with fire here.  You will lose and YOU will be the jerk.  Remem­ber that and also, the key from item 1. is to lis­ten and ask her why she feels how she feels.
3. If she wants to be left alone, oblige her — Many times women don’t want to deal with what­ever is mak­ing them angry.  I’m a con­fronta­tional per­son in a rela­tion­ship, I like to force the action when pos­si­ble because I think that’s a good way to get every­thing on the table.  This is great if the world worked and thought the way I do… But it doesn’t and so I have to check my ego.  When a woman is ready to talk, you’ll know.  Respect her imposed soli­tude.  This one’s espe­cially tough because, per­son­ally, I want to strike when the iron’s hot.  A friend of mine is upset with me, but refuses to talk to me because she’s upset.  If she were a guy I’d be over at their place rap­ping on the door and bust it down, but women are just different…
4. Get specifics — This one can be tricky because she may tell you that you’re an ass­hole and insen­si­tive.  Okay, about what?  We men deal in specifics, eso­teric terms.  Ask her ques­tions about how she feels.  There is some­thing spe­cific that she’s upset about, unless she’s a com­plete loony.  Just be patient and help her under­stand that you want to get to the bot­tom of the issue and work things out. Did you guess that lis­ten­ing helps here?  Well, it does.  Also, I’ve found from my many years spent in retail man­age­ment that one clever way to calm peo­ple down is to restate their ques­tion and say it back to them.  Not only will it show you are lis­ten­ing, but that you are also try­ing to under­stand the issues at hand.
5. Sex it out — If you are a brave and bold soul you can try the angry sex exper­i­ment.  You’ll never know if it’s going to work unless you try.  Either this will be a bril­liant stroke of genius or she will knee you in the beans and send your sorry ass pack­ing.  That’s quite a risk for reward sce­nario.  I can tell you that I chose the ‘sex it out’ sce­nario… After we were able to talk about things civilly.  Again, use with caution.

So if your woman wants to beat the snot out of you in a vio­lent non sexy way you have a few meth­ods at your dis­posal.  If they don’t work, run like For­rest Gump.

Related posts:

1. 5 Ways to Fail at Being the Jeal­ous Type.
2. 5 Ways to Tell if Your New Girl Digs You Like Dig Dug.
3. 5 Crappy Ways to Dump Your Sig­nif­i­cant Other
4. Break­ing Down the Breakup.
5. 4 Ways to Get Over Your Shyness.