Women, listen up! This advice could save your marriage — even if it isn’t in jeopardy. It’s all about giving your man time to himself in his very own man cave. We are different beings, men and women, and while women tend to gravitate toward their friends and social media for peace and order, men’s tendencies go the opposite direction — inward. So, what better than to offer him a place for recluse? His own space with everything he likes.
Is it fair? Yes. Just? Yep. If you would like to have a space to yourself, you can have one too. But as mentioned, men are different creatures and require a reset at times. If this is in the form of retreating to the garage, an office or music room then so be it. Guaranteed, he will come out a different man than when he went in. So, be the best wife ever and ask him where he’d like his space to be and if you can do anything to get it started, if he hasn’t already checked out the mademan manual for it.
Why, do you ask? Why should you be helping him with this endeavor?
It’s a classic cliché for a reason— opposites DO attract. What you are missing, you want your partner to have and vice versa. But, what this means is that you both have to answer to your Doppelgänger (your alter ego, your inner evil twin). You might find that your spouse begins to help out a little more around the house because he has refreshed his spirit in this personal space. Whether he goes down to the basement outfitted with a library of video games and a ping pong table or he retreats to the garage to tinker around on his Alfa Romeo classic car for an hour or so, when you reunite, there will be a lesser veil of separation.
Again, what about you and your space? Find something that you like too. Maybe a bubble bath by candle light with a glass of wine and a glossy magazine is your restart button. Or possibly sitting outside for a half-hour reading, playing with the cats for a little while each day or a weekly girls’ night out.
He Just Might Long for You
Give him freedom to be alone and he might just give you more love. When the hubby comes home in the evenings after a long day, of course he wants to see you but at the same time he’s moody and sensitive, possibly short-tempered after having to keep his cool all day. What a better time than to retreat, do something he likes to do for a bit and then come to you, out from his man cave with a fresh mind and open heart (in theory).
You Don’t Have to Worry About Him
With a Keg-O-Rator, old-school stand-up video games, football-shaped sofa, a dart board and a table made of beer bottles, your man can have the time of his life right at your own home. He can invite the guys over for a poker game, make a turtle burger (bacon, a hamburger patty, a few hot dogs and cheese all as a solid burger) or sit around and talk about his collection of neon beer signs he’s got hanging up on every inch of the room. At the end of the day, he’ll be safe and sound in bed with you, snoring like an old man. And you can sleep peacefully.
Jack Du ponte A veteran from the Gulf War, Jack found out that he had a deep passion for food and grilling when he bought his first hibachi. Now his kids want dad to cook everyday of the week.
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